1. Craftmanship

I think it is important to do things well. Not everything, but some things at least. This takes time and effort. And also a certain attitude. An attitude that says I am going to prioritise this task, and do this task well, no matter how much time and effort it takes. I will reflect on what I have done, and keep doing the things i do well (even if they get boring, or there are other things to do, or i am tired, or whatever) and change the things i don't do well. And I will reflect on what i am doing over time, and continually change whenever i need to.

For example there are the things that I've prioritised - teaching and nurturing Noah, then Uma and Jai. A lot of this comes naturally for me but i still need to reflect and change and get better. I prioritise it, and get a pride and energy out of doing it well. Even when it takes effort, i feel an instinct that most people don't have, and it feels like I'm on a different level. It can feel like meditation with a purpose. I think this is what's meant by "flow"; the ability to do something difficult without really needing to think.

I have another important job, being an ED Physician. This is the sort of job that one needs to do well, not do a half-assed job. At some stage in my career, I made the decision to try hard to do the clinical roles well, or at least well enough. It is not something that came naturally for me, so I've needed to keep working hard for many years, to feel the tension and chaos and mental exhaustion, until a lot of it has become second nature, and I can finally, sometimes "flow".

Then there's my other jobs.. my non clinical roles at work (especially teaching more junior ED docs), being a partner to my wife, being present for my elderly parents. These things all suffer when i am short of time and energy. I go through the motions a lot, allow myself to be underprepared, to be not fully present. Que sera, none of us can be perfect, right? At least I can't.

2. Flow

If I understand correctly, the man who coined this word "flow", Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, thought that people with lots of flow activities in their life are more likely to be happy and content. Flow activities can be very diverse, from chanting in groups or choirs, to dancing, or skiing, or sport or meditation. For me, there are a select few.. being a Dad, trekking, and playing cards are the ones that have come easily, but sadly i no longer play cards or trek. Work, bar conversations, pool, more rarely and unpredictably. Hopefully, I'll find others some time.