I went out to see a man who i think is one of the great thinkers and comedians at least out of the people i have seen. This is the forth time i have seen him over the years, and he came full circle, back to a genuine standup show, full of irony and observations about the world. I went with my wife and two other of my closest friends. We had met for a meal at the same restaurant where my wife and i went 7 plus years ago after I'd proposed. So, seemingly just what i needed to cheer me up from my dark space. But here's the thing... I don't feel cheered exactly, more that all my emotions have been turned up, my senses made acute. Like my 20s again. This is good, better than being numbed and disengaged. The urges to write, converse, love, scream, escape the world all take turns to rise. I want to walk alone through the streets of Melbourne. And photograph, though i know I'll always be a hack at this. I just want to record the moment, without having to find a specific place and light, or wait and plan and edit. Just a spontaneous moment in time, flick out the camera, twirl some dials and snap. Thick grey clouds slumber fitfully over Northcote this morning, and golden rays pierce through defiantly. Naturally. I always take the weather with me.

I have been in denial somewhat. I am using much energy looking after my littler kids. I keep some time and energy to hang out with my bigger kid. And to spend with my wife. And my friends, though not as much as I'd like. And some time for myself, walking, observing, seeing art in different forms. Jai's blog was good, and fulfilled a need at the time. But i felt i should say that everything is alright. To say Jai's happy, I'm happy, let's move on. It's kinda true, life is kinda good on a day to day basis. But still, everything is not alright. And that is one reason for my blog. "News from Nowhere" sounds cool. But "Words to Nobody" is closer to the truth. My howl at the sky.